If Movie Sequels Were Awesome – World Cup Special

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Klose (2014)

The touching story of German goalpoacher Miroslav Klose who must cope with life with friends who are a bunch of shallow arseholes who swear a lot and try to make it look like they’re in a film rather than a play. Klose must navigate the relationship problems and trying to score a goal for Germany despite being distracted by Natalie Portman stripping. Has already had a sequel ‘Miro Miro’ greenlit in which Klose finds a magic mirror.

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Keep your eye on the goal Miroslav!

“An obvious world cup cash in. Avoid” – Shoot

“Almost all of this biopic is fictional, pointless” – Die Welt

“Klose struggles to play himself. Julia Roberts looks bored” – The Daily Planet

“A Touching, brutally honest, tale of a man who can’t score a goal from out side the penalty area” – Screenkicker

I’m writing this during the World Cup final. This should give you some indication of how exciting the match is. I want a goal!

17 comments

  1. I have been rooting for Klose ever since I first saw him play and I almost pissed myself of happiness when my fav team FINALLY got their well-deserved trophy, but this post cracked me up, hard. Thank you!!

    Like

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