Klose (2014)
The touching story of German goalpoacher Miroslav Klose who must cope with life with friends who are a bunch of shallow arseholes who swear a lot and try to make it look like they’re in a film rather than a play. Klose must navigate the relationship problems and trying to score a goal for Germany despite being distracted by Natalie Portman stripping. Has already had a sequel ‘Miro Miro’ greenlit in which Klose finds a magic mirror.
“An obvious world cup cash in. Avoid” – Shoot
“Almost all of this biopic is fictional, pointless” – Die Welt
“Klose struggles to play himself. Julia Roberts looks bored” – The Daily Planet
“A Touching, brutally honest, tale of a man who can’t score a goal from out side the penalty area” – Screenkicker
I’m writing this during the World Cup final. This should give you some indication of how exciting the match is. I want a goal!
Screenkicker! 
*applause* this is brilliant. 😀
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Haha I’m glad your sense of humour is as stupid as mine! 🙂
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XD
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I was so happy that it didn’t end up as a penalty shoot-out; I’m just glad that SOMEONE scored, even if I was rooting for Argentina!
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I didn’t mind who won. Germany deserved it though. I’m so sick of penalties!
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This is absolutely beautiful.
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Is Glenn Close in this?
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I would definitely watch this. Sounds entertaining!
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I smell an Oscar…and something else.
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HAHA great post… At first I was thinking.. Klose.. huh ohhhhhh I get it. haha
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Hahaha! Um. Who’s Miroslav Klose?
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He’s a German footballer! I just couldn’t resist the shitty pun 🙂
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You never can. ; )
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I have been rooting for Klose ever since I first saw him play and I almost pissed myself of happiness when my fav team FINALLY got their well-deserved trophy, but this post cracked me up, hard. Thank you!!
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WOW he fits right in! 😉
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This is excellent!
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Thanks!
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