San Andreas (2015) – Shake, Rattle, and Rock

I’ve got quite a short review for you all today. This is partly due to me going through an incredibly lazy spell but also because there isn’t much to this movie to talk about. So hide under a table and prepare to be rocked by a half-assed review of San Andreas.

San Andreas might be one of the most cliché filled movies I’ve ever seen. It would be easily adaptable into a drinking game but the result would be many deaths and increased sales of stomach pumps to hospitals. Heroic father – check, hot daughter – check, estranged wife – check, slimy rich guy – check. You get the idea. Despite this it’s an entertaining disaster film that won’t rock your world but will pass a couple of hours.

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To be honest I’d be staring at his bicep too

The plot couldn’t be more simple. Dwayne Johnson is a helicopter rescue pilot with an estranged wife and hot daughter who has to save the day when a series of massive earthquakes hit California. What follows are scenes of huge destruction as Los Angeles and San Francisco get the shit shook out of them. It’s standard disaster movie stuff but it’s refreshing to have good old Mother Nature as the villain rather than aliens or monsters that only show up in the last ten minutes. It’s a very silly movie that plays everything straight giving it an earnest quality that’s enjoyable.

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When the shaking starts, you’ll thank me

Johnson is great as always as the concerned parent who risks everything to save his family. Despite a script that’s pretty standard, Johnson still manages to exude charm and pathos, demonstrating his ability to be relatable despite being built like a mythological creature. His daughter is played by Alexandra Daddario proving that massive chests must run in the family. She’s likable as a resourceful young woman that’s learned a lot from her dad but get’s lumbered with a couple of English guys in San Francisco when the quakes hit. Paul Giamatti fills the role of scientist that tries to warn everyone about the earthquake and says lines like ‘may god be with you’ – take another drink here.

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Enjoy your cruise Rachelle!

San Andreas is an enjoyable enough disaster flick.  It mainly avoids the schmaltzy and jingoistic aspects of a Roland Emmerich film and has a likable cast that throws itself into the action. However it gets to the point that once you’ve seen one earthquake you’ve more or less seen them all. A third act tsunami shakes things up a bit but it’s too little, too late, to lift San Andreas from being an average movie. If you’re a fan of Dwayne Johnson, disaster films, or just want to play the drinking game then you’ll probably get a lot out of this inoffensive, fun, unoriginal, movie.

6/10

Have you seen San Andreas? Do you live on a major fault line? Do you have any drinking game suggestions? Let me know in the comments below.

 

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13 comments

  1. This is dumb fun, filled with super dramatic moments punctuated by dumb one liners. And I found it entertaining, flawed sure, but a nice 100 minutes at the theater.

    By the way, your first pic is from Fast & Furious 6 lol.

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  2. I enjoyed this flick because frankly I adore a predictable plot disaster flick as a guilty pleasure- if it has all the over-the-top stuff one would expect for a fun thrill ride on a Summer afternoon. I agree with you- I also enjoyed Johnson’s & Daddario’s performances. She seems packaged to be the non-slutty version of the next Megan Fox- but with better acting skills. (Thank GAWD!)

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  3. This: “Heroic father – check, hot daughter – check, estranged wife – check, slimy rich guy – check.” sounds like the plot for Taken haha. However, I will still watch this because I really do enjoy The Rock. Sounds fun, but stupid.

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  4. I just watched this the other night. I agree with your points made – this movie has such similarities with Taken, and every single disaster/action movie ever. Though Johnson is always entertaining and the movie was stupid fun. It would make a GREAT drinking game!

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  5. Just caught up with this. Watched it recently and the reviews are massively overlapping! I liked this for what it was, and will watch The Rock in pretty much anything. Cheesy, but very entertaining.

    His character is a bit of a dick for trashing a rescue chopper (IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BIGGEST DISASTER EVEZ) to save one person – his introduced-as-a-total-bitch wife!!!!

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