Mini-Kickers – Ted 2, Jurassic World, True Story

Firstly, apologies for the lack of new Screenkicker articles this month, I’ve been burnt out after the film festival and also I really needed to finish Arkham Knight. Anyway, it’s Mini-Kicker time again where I throw some bite-sized reviews into your eager open mouths. This time the theme connecting the three movies is ‘man befriends strange, unbelievable creature’ with each featuring respectively living teddy bears, dinosaurs, and James Franco. You’re right, I picked the films before I came up with a theme.

Ted 2 (2015)

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Ted accidentally stumbles upon those nude shots I did in the 90s. I needed the money, don’t judge me!

After A Million Ways To Die In The West, Seth McFarlane has figured out that he’s much more popular when he doesn’t actually appear on screen. Ted 2 isn’t as novel, or hilarious as the first movie, but it’s still very funny. Using a plot that I’m pretty sure was already an episode of Family Guy, the movie involves Ted fighting to have the government recognise him as a person. Mark Wahlberg shows again that he’s a brilliant comedy actor as his chemistry with Ted is the heart of the film. The best jokes come at the expense of Amanda Seyfried’s face and a side-splitting trip to an improv comedy club. Ted 2 is overlong and recycles the plot from the first film but has enough laughs to make it worthwhile viewing.

7/10

Jurassic World (2015)

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You pay Β£60 for a ticket and only get to see a goat. This is like my childhood holidays all over again

Jurassic World shouldn’t be so good. Firstly it comes from a director with only a quirky indie picture under his belt and secondly it’s a sequel to f**king Jurassic Park! What could have been a cash-in on a well known brand is actually a brilliant, action-packed, blockbuster that pays respect to the original. It does this by cleverly satirizing the trend of films where ‘bigger = better’. A great cast including everyone’s favourite movie everyman Chris Pratt throw around funny lines while dinosaurs smash, crash, crunch, and munch all around. Much like its genetically spliced main monster, Jurassic World borrows from films such as Romancing The Stone, Aliens, and many others. It’s always entertaining and I loved all of the affectionate nods to the first movie. Apart from that little cartoon DNA guy, he can go f**k himself.

8/10

True Story (2015)

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Jonah immediately regretted his decision to go speed dating

True Story is one of those movies where the actual story is more interesting than the film is. It’s a very simple concept – journalist Mike Finkel (Jonah Hill) gets to interview murder suspect Christian Longo (James Franco) before his trial. Did Longo really murder his family? Why is he so interested in talking to Finkel? Is he telling the truth? These are all questions you could get the answers to by using Google for about five minutes. True Story on the other hand moves at a glacial pace. You’ll start to forget why you care after another scene where Jonah Hill stares mournfully at the notes he puts up on his wall. Felicity Jones doesn’t have much to do as Hill’s wife other than look concerned all the time. The movie goes for a Primal Fear style vibe but misses the mark by a mile. Sometimes truth is far more boring than fiction.

4/10

Have you seen any of these? What did you think? Which would you be most afraid of being trapped in a cage withΒ – a dinosaur, a bear, or James Franco? Let me know in the comments below.

20 comments

  1. great recaps Mikey. I completely agree with u on JW, have no desire to see T2 and I’m apparently the only person in the whoile world who actually liked TS πŸ™‚

    Nice to see u back

    Like

  2. What’s your rating for True Story?! This is bugging me! There’s no rating! I can’t sleep tonight until I know your rating!!!! I actually loved Ted so do want to see Ted 2 even though the plot sounds a little like Miracle on 34th Street. And Jurassic World was a fun watch but I can see it slipping further & further down my list of favorite movies by the end of the year. Nice to have you back on the blogs, dude! I think… πŸ˜‰

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Ugh True Story was soooooooooo boring!!

    Out of all of those I think James Franco would be the most scary to be trapped with.

    Like

  4. Interesting musings. After seeing such a high score for Jurassic Park I’m inclined to watch it, I wonder if its still playing at cinemas….

    PS – How is Arkham Knight?? I only have a PC so we don’t have it yet 😦

    Like

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